


Must Be This Tall to Ride

by Misaya



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Amusement Park, Christmas Fluff, Disney World & Disneyland, Established Levi/Erwin Smith, Established Relationship, Gift Fic, M/M, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 23:46:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5475020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Misaya/pseuds/Misaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The eruris go to Disneyland, and Levi vaguely wishes he'd had the foresight to feign a migraine, or food poisoning. Something, anything, really, to avoid the mass of screaming children, the unseasonably hot December weather, and the exorbitant prices for a bottle of water.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Must Be This Tall to Ride

**Author's Note:**

> My gift for eruri secret santa 2015, for trashpits! <3  
> Hope you like it!

Levi vaguely wished he’d had the foresight three hours before to feign a migraine or food poisoning, or some other relatively mild medical condition that could be here one day and gone the next. But he hadn’t, because Erwin hadn’t told him where they’d been going – he’d only told Levi to bring his wallet, sunglasses, and a small tube of sunscreen - and Levi was vaguely considering giving him a stern talking to once they got home.

Children darted eagerly around the park, their childish laughter and chatter drilling straight into Levi’s skull as he clung to Erwin’s hand and tried not to lose him among the throng of people that flooded the streets and avenues of the amusement park on their way to line up for different rides, to go to the myriad gift shops that littered the park, or to purchase astronomically-expensive food to feed their screaming children. Levi massaged his temples with his free hand as Erwin dragged him over to a large arrow that read Tomorrowland and handed his camera easily over to a stranger, kindly requesting that she take a picture of them. She obliged, and when Erwin retrieved his camera, Levi tried to ignore the fact that he was squinting directly into the sun, that he had bared all of his teeth in some savage attempt at a smile, but Erwin was utterly oblivious to it and just tucked the small digital camera back into his pocket, grabbing Levi’s hand again and setting off towards the nearest ride at a jaunty pace. 

He had long ago given up on waiting anything less than a good hour and a half for a ride, and Levi took the time to smear another blob of sunscreen over the back of his neck, which he could already feel roasting to a crisp under the hot sunlight. Fucking global warming, he thought to himself in irritation as he smeared Coppertone onto his skin. It wasn’t supposed to be this hot in fucking December, and, for that matter, Levi should have been sitting at home, sipping hot chocolate and wrapped in three blankets with a thick novel by a crackling fireplace.

Erwin, of course, seemed not to mind, and looked as happy as a clam, whatever that meant, and Levi envied him his happiness as they slowly shuffled forward in line for Star Tours. 

The particularly rambunctious child behind them stepped on the back of Levi’s shoe. Levi sighed in irritation as Erwin beamed happily down at the tot, waving and turning all goggly as he was prone to do whenever anything below waist height entered the vicinity. 

“You’re certainly in top form today,” Levi sniffed as the line inched forward and Erwin reached into their backpack to pull out a $4.50 bottle of water (Levi had nearly fainted away at the price).

“It’s the happiest place on earth, Levi,” Erwin reminded him with a shrug as he unscrewed the cap off the water bottle and took a healthy sip before offering it to Levi. The cool water funneled into his mouth and ran down his throat, offering a brief moment of relief from the burning heat and the crush of the crowd. The boy behind them stepped on the back of Levi’s shoe again. “And the tickets you got me last Christmas were going to expire.”

When Levi had bought those tickets for his husband, he had fully expected Erwin to bring one of his work colleagues with him. Perhaps Hanji, whom Levi had heard was just as Disney obsessed as Erwin was. Someone who could appreciate the theme park just as much as Erwin could. When Levi had bought those tickets for Erwin, he had not expected that he would find himself towed, somewhat against his will, to the happiest place on earth, which was very quickly giving him a horrific sunburn and blisters on the backs of his heels. 

They trudged forward, into the shade, finally, and Levi pushed his sunglasses back on top of his head, grimacing as his fingertips brushed against the damp roots of his hair. It was positively criminal to have so many people in one space, he thought to himself for the umpteenth time that day. Didn’t these children have to be in school? Didn’t their parents have to be in work? He ignored the fact that both he and Erwin had taken days off for this, Erwin because he’d been planning this probably since he and Levi had started dating back in the olden days, and Levi because he’d thought Erwin was going to treat him to a spa day or something equally relaxing of the sort. 

The line wound labyrinthine inside, where at least it was marginally cooler, though Levi could barely hear himself think, the sound of hundreds of people chattering away slightly overlaid with the robotic voiceovers of the android standing behind a glass panel across the room from where the throng of people waited against the wall. The light inside was dim, threading red and blue fingers through Erwin’s hair, but Levi could make out the utter awe and delight written across Erwin’s face, and resolved to keep his bitter thoughts to himself.

As it turned out, the ride itself didn’t look half bad. It didn’t look anything too wild, Levi thought to himself as they were led into a small theater and instructed to sit down and fasten their seat belts. Levi looked to his left. The small child from behind him had already buckled himself in, clutching at the armrests with an almost manic look of glee. No, it couldn’t be too bad at all if they were allowing small children on it, no sudden drops or scares like Splash Mountain had had. Levi’s heart still raced at the memory, though his clothes had dried long ago from the incessant heat and all the walking they’d been doing around the park.

Erwin grinned over at him as the room darkened, leaning over to press a kiss to the swell of Levi’s cheekbone. “Thanks,” he whispered, his lips feathering over Levi’s skin, and Levi thought that perhaps it was all worth it, his sunburnt skin, his aching feet, the pricey bottles of water, if only to see Erwin so joyfully uninhibited.

The spaceship display on screen was going well, the android talking them through their space flight and their mission, and Levi was even beginning to doze off a little when the floor suddenly started shaking.

“We’re hit!” the golden android crowed. “Buckle up, because it looks like we’re going to have a bumpy ride!” Levi reached over and seized Erwin’s hand in a crushing grip as the room began to shake and jounce around in a rather good imitation of an airplane flying through heavy turbulence. Levi wasn’t good with flying, and he wasn’t good with this, and Erwin patted his hand reassuringly even as his eyes were fixed fast to the screen. 

“You didn’t tell me that ride was scary!” Levi protested as they staggered out into the sunlight twenty minutes later. The boy, who had trailed out after them, dragging his happy, exasperated mother behind him, let loose a peal of giggles at Levi’s expense. Levi couldn’t even bring himself to glare.

“It wasn’t scary,” Erwin protested, trying not to laugh; the child’s chuckles were infectious, though, and he couldn’t stop a grin from blossoming across his face that Levi was just itching to slap off. “It’s a 4D experience, it said it across the banner with the wait times.”

“Well, I – I didn’t read it,” Levi shot back, defensively, but he allowed Erwin to take his hand and tug him through the crowds toward their next destination. He only got a glimpse of the word ‘Space’ written in three feet high Futura before Erwin herded him past the entrance to the line.

A good thing, too, because after Splash Mountain, Levi would have been loathe to trust anything that had the word ‘Mountain’ in the title. This included the rest of the rides they went on that day, Space Mountain and Thunder Mountain both, and would extend for years afterward when Erwin would ask Levi if he wanted to watch Brokeback Mountain and Levi whapped him on the arm with a rolled up newspaper.

But that is a story for another time, and Levi came out of Space Mountain an hour and a half later, his hair sticking up in odd wind-blown tufts all over his head and still trying to make sure that the ground was solid beneath his feet again. Objectively, the ride had been beautiful, cool rushes of air all around him and lovely neon shapes that were supposed to be constellations and new planets, but Levi had been unable to fully appreciate it; his hands had been curled claws over their cart’s grab bars and his eyes had been squinched nearly shut in his attempt to hang on to his sanity.

Erwin was having the time of his life, and with a long suffering expression, Levi trailed after him as his husband studied an upside down map of the park, and proclaimed that they would be heading to The Haunted Mansion next.

* * *

 

After several hours in line, during which they managed to hit Thunder Mountain (Erwin almost had to carry Levi through the line, with how much the other man had dragged his heels and protested about it), the Pirates of the Caribbean ride (which Levi enjoyed immensely, thanks to the multiple gratuitous statues of Jack Sparrow placed strategically around the ride), and the Haunted Mansion (which Levi almost fell asleep on), they stood in the final line of the day. 

“Must we?” Levi asked, snippily, as he tried his level best not to glare at all the children in the line, clinging to their parents’ hands or sitting in their strollers, or sobbing over spilt ice creams. It was getting to the end of the day, finally starting to cool off, and Levi’s feet were aching something fierce though he’d worn his most comfortable sneakers. “Must we really?”

The icing white front of the ride loomed over them, casting shadow across their faces while the gold clocks installed inside ticked away a merry tune.

“We must,” Erwin declared, but he looked at Levi with his best approximation of puppy dog eyes, begging, imploring. It was downright pitiful, but Levi was weak when it came to Erwin’s whims, and with a dramatic sigh, he continued to inch forward in line, tiredly scowling as he stepped into a puddle of melted strawberry ice cream. He’d definitely have to give the bottoms of these shoes a good washing when they got home, and perhaps it would be time to pull that old foot bath/massager they’d gotten as a wedding gift off the top shelf of the closet, where it had been collecting dust for the past three years.

The tinny music echoed in Levi’s ears as he clambered into the boat, squishing himself in next to Erwin, who wrapped his arm around Levi’s shoulders easily. The touch was comforting, the gesture soothing, and Levi relaxed marginally as their boat advanced into the mouth of the ride, shuddering only slightly along the track. 

As the cool darkness enveloped him, Levi looked around for the source of the music. Of course he’d heard of the ride, anyone living within a 5,000 mile radius of the continental US had heard of it, but he didn’t quite know to expect, and his jaw dropped as the doors swung open and spilled them into a world of color and light. Mechanized dolls from all countries danced around them, singing with all their hearts in all languages. Levi caught strains of French, German, even Chinese, among others that he couldn’t even begin to identify, and he leaned into Erwin’s shoulder as he craned his neck back to look at the dolls dancing on the rooftops of churches and cathedrals, architecture from faraway places that Levi had never seen before. 

Admittedly, the music was a bit grating on the nerves, but presently, Levi didn’t mind one bit. The display was entrancing, beautiful, and the ride went at a calm and soothing pace, enough to steady his nerves rattled from a long day of noise and adrenaline.

The ride was over far too quickly, too quickly for Levi to fully appreciate the exquisite artistry of it all. He almost regretted stepping out of the boat onto dry land to relinquish his seat to another person, and as they were heading back to the main entrance of the park, he found his footsteps slow and dragging. Part of this was surely from the fact that they’d been on their feet all day, but part of him wanted to go back and step in line for It’s a Small World again.

“I had fun,” Levi admitted, grudgingly, almost, as he sat down in the passenger side of the car with a sigh of relief as Erwin situated himself in the driver’s seat, slotting the key into the ignition. “It was fun, despite the heat and the screaming children and the exorbitant prices.”

Erwin smiled happily over at Levi, tired and flushed with joy. “Do you really think so?” he asked cheerfully. 

“I did,” Levi replied, stretching and trying to work out the kink in his shoulder as Erwin joined the queue of cars trying to exit back onto the highway. It dissolved after a few minutes of intense massage, and he sighed in relief, leaning back against the seat and letting his eyes drift closed, ready for a well-deserved nap on the hour drive back home.

“Well, that’s good,” Erwin mused. “I upgraded to season passes for us.” 

Levi’s eyes shot open and Erwin cackled with glee even as he leaned over to press a kiss to Levi’s slack lips.


End file.
